What does it mean to live “in the moment?” How can I plan for tomorrow when I’m living “one day at a time”? How do I learn from past experiences if I don’t look back?
- How did/do I live not in the moment?
- Anger and resentment – Living in the past.
- Chewing over past actions – blaming (myself or others)
- Fear and worry – Living in the future.
- “Awfulizing”
- What are aspects of living in the moment?
- Take care of the things I can do now, let go of the things I cannot do.
- Do the “next right thing”.
- Be fully present in what is happening.
- Listen
- Notice the beauty around me
- Enjoy what is good now (instead of ruminating on what was bad or worrying about what might be bad)
- How can I practice living in the moment?
- Cultivate an attitude of gratitude.
- Focus on what is happening now.
- Focus on the people I am with.
- Listen – don’t be thinking about my agenda
- Mindfulness meditation (or other meditative practice)
- Body language – when my body is in an accepting, listening position, so is my mind.
- Positive expectations – How they can shape interactions and actions. (“Batman” episode of This American Life and Invisibilia)
- What about planning for the future and learning from the past?
- There’s a difference between worrying about what might happen, and planning for what we would like to do.
- We can and should look at our past in our inventory. We only need to let go of the desire to change it.
Upcoming topics include caretaking, being the “Al-Anon parent” in an alcoholic marriage, and Concept 3, which says “The right of decision makes effective leadership possible.” Please call us at 734-707-8795 or email feedback@therecoveryshow.com with your questions or experience, strength and hope. Or just leave a comment right here.
Music from the show
Jason Mraz – Living in the Moment
Jay-Z – Young Forever
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E1nbvplgElw
James Morrison – One Life
Other Stuff
Spencer mentioned a couple of books: Stitches by Anne Lamott and The Zen of Listening by Rebecca Z. Shafir
Dear Spencer,
I have the feeling that I haven’t expressed myself clearly in my email in regard to the „dry drunk“ topic because you get me all wrong.
Due to my own state of non serenity, two weeks without meetings, I get so much triggered. I wanted to express my understanding of that feeling, which I had too when I started in Al Anon.
BUT later I have learned that it is not my assignment to determine the mental status of another person. In Al Anon I have learned to focus on myself and only talk about myself. Talking about the “dry drunk” symptom would mean to talk about someone else. So I don’t think that it is an Al Anon topic, beside I talk about how I feel when I miss too many meetings.
I agree, directing to Marks podcast. I think the whole poadcast is about how to avoid being dry drunk, what is being miserable and being very close to drink again. The solution is to work the program.
Hopefully I was able to me more precise now.
Many greetings Ruth