Being a victim is more palatable than having to recognize the intrinsic contradictions of one's own governing philosophy.
Tom Clancy, “The Hunt for Red October”
When I saw this quote, I thought, “Bingo!” This is one of my truths in my life. Before program, I bemoaned my life and my place in it. If anyone offered advice on how to alter my situation, I found myself explaining a list of well-practiced reasons as to why I was a victim. The truth was I was scared. And I was too scared to take an honest look at my own part in the situation because I was afraid I might see that my worst fears about me are true.
Thankfully, I came into the program and started working the Steps. Steps 4, 5, 6, & 7 helped me out with learning to see what my part is and then accepting myself with compassion for who I was. It also helped me a great deal to get a Sponsor who could remain emotionally detached from my life and call me out on “the intrinsic contradictions of [my] own governing philosophy” and help me to learn tools to grow spiritually. These were but some of the many many gifts of the program.
A meditation for June 8, 2013.
Stronger – Kanye West