My Body, My Codependency – Episode 204

The pit of my stomach is churning.
My neck and shoulders are tense.
I don’t have any energy.
My whole body is out of whack.

Do you feel this way? Have you felt like this? Let’s take a look at how living with alcoholism or addiction can our bodies and our health.

  • How was my body affected by the alcoholism in my house?
    • Laying awake at night worrying — tired and sleepy all the time.
    • “Knot in my stomach” — From “awfulizing” and “catastrophizing” the future and worrying about the present.
    • Anger and resentment — tension in my body — muscle pain
  • I had no energy for anything other than stewing about my situation.
    • No exercise
    • Poor eating habits (junk food)
    • Weight gain
    • Resulting in even less energy
  • The things I did to try to dull the pain.
    • Eating
    • My own drinking
  • Feedback effects
    • Not taking care of my body leads to loss of energy
    • Leading to depressed feelings.
    • And worry about my health.
    • Without the energy to “fix” it..
    • Leading to more not taking care of my body.
  • How does recovery change things?
  • Letting go
    • When I can “let go and let God”, I can loosen the knot of worry. I can relax the tension of anger and resentment. I can get go bed at a reasonable time, because I’m not sitting up late with worry or anger (or both!)
  • “Take care of myself”
    • Easier to do when I start letting go of taking care of my loved one.
    • Eat “right”.
    • Get some exercise.
    • Getting enough sleep.
  • Breathe
  • Meditate
    • Practice being still
    • Relaxing physical tension
  • HALT — Hungry, Angry, Lonely, Tired — When I am these things, I am more likely to “act out”. Being aware of the state of my body can help me live a calmer, more serene life.
  • Putting myself (my health, my well-being) first
    • Putting on my own oxygen mask
    • Learning to support rather than control
    • Practicing gratitude and acceptance


From Courage to Change: January 21, July 21, August 16, December 19.

From How Al-Anon Works: Chapter 12, Taking Care of Ourselves.

  • Please call us at 734-707-8795 or email with your questions or experience, strength and hope. Or just leave a comment right here.

Continue reading “My Body, My Codependency – Episode 204”

Worry – Episode 119

vultureDo you worry a lot? Is it hard to get your mind off the terrible things that might happen? Or maybe it’s just obsessing on the stuff that is wrong in your life today?

  • Think about a time before program when you were worrying.
    • What were you worrying about?
    • How did worrying affect your life at the time? (Inability to get things done, acid stomach, lack of sleep, etc?)
    • Did you get any resolution of your problem from your worrying?
  • Think about a recent time when you could have worried?
    • Did you worry?
    • How was it different from the time before?
    • How did you use program tools in this situation?
    • Were you able to move out of worrying into some productive resolution?
  • What is worry?
  • How does it differ from preparation?
    • Slogan: “Worry is not preparation”.
    • But also: “Preparation is not worry.”
  • Does “Let Go and Let God” mean we shouldn’t do anything?
  • What slogans and steps help you when you find yourself worrying?
  • What would you say to someone who can’t stop worrying about their loved one who still drinks or drugs?

Upcoming topics include laughter, Al-Anon dreams, and Concepts 6 & 7. Please call us at 734-707-8795 or email with your questions or experience, strength and hope. Or just leave a comment right here.
Continue reading “Worry – Episode 119”

worry – a meditation


Worrying doesn’t take away tomorrow’s troubles. It takes away today’s peace.

If worrying was an Olympic sport, I think I’d win gold every time. I often do everything I can in a situation and then when there is literally nothing else I can do, I worry. I start thinking of all the worst case scenarios and it triggers my fears. In all of these worst case scenarios, I end up alone, worthless, and unlovable. I engage in controlling behavior because that’s my defense mechanism, and I lose my serenity.

Just writing a general overview of how my mind works required a paragraph. In reality, this process of worrying takes up takes up more than a paragraph in my head. It takes up the space of books, of epic novels. I have found, however, I never lose my serenity, when I worry. I just lose sight of it. I bury it under all these other things because I make them a priority over my serenity. I just put piles and stack of my epic novels of worry on top of my serenity. When I see my serenity like this, I see how easy it is to get it back. I just turn over my worries to my Higher Power. I imagine myself taking each “book of worry” off the stack and putting it in my Higher Power’s hands. Then, when there is no more worry, I find that all I am left with is my Higher Power and my serenity.

A meditation for June 23, 2013.

Continue reading “worry – a meditation”