sophrosyne – a meditation


sophrosyne – (n.) a healthy state of mind, characterized by self-control, moderation, and a deep awareness of one's true self, and resulting in true happiness.


I think this meditation is pretty self-explanatory, but the one thing I loved that I wanted to draw attention to about this is that it does not specify what each of these is. It doesn't say that in order to have a healthy state of mind, you have to a certain way, or anything else. This is something that I've noticed in my program of recovery, too. I am given 12 Steps, but the implementation of those Steps is up to me. I decide what a healthy state of mind means for me. And that can change from day to day. That can change from minute to minute. And I love that in leaving that portion of it open-ended, my program helps me to to learn to define who I am rather than tell me who I ought to be. For that I am eternally grateful.

A meditation for July 20, 2013.

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be – a meditation


You are a child of the Universe,
No less than the trees and the stars;
You have a right to be here.
And whether or not it is clear to you,
No doubt the Universe is unfolding as it should.

-Desiderata Les Crane

Someone once told me “You exist so you have the right to be.” I thought why did this person just repeat themselves in the same sentence. As I worked on the 12 Steps of Recovery, however, I realized that I often deny myself the right to be. I deny myself the right to set boundaries, or stand up for myself, or even acknowledge my own feelings. In the face of any opposition or conflict, I used to shut down – I'd freeze or simply submit to the other person's wishes.

Now that I am in the program, I realize, I do not have to. I can ask for my needs to be met and I can meet those needs myself. If I need to feel safe, I can tell the other person that I am feeling scared or uncomfortable and request that they stop behaving in a certain manner towards me. If they choose not to, I can meet my own needs by leaving that situation for that moment.

When I realized this, I suddenly felt angry with myself for not knowing this sooner – for not being that person earlier. But, thanks to the program, my Higher Power, and my Sponsor, I was able to realize that those behaviors were helpful to me once and I can grateful for those behaviors because they kept me safe once. They kept me alive. How could I not feel gratitude for that? But now I can realize that those behaviors do not work for me in my current situations.

For me, it's like doing well in history class and then going to my math class and trying to apply what I learned in history class. It just doesn't work. It doesn't mean history is any better or worse a subject than math. It just means what I learned in history just won't help me score well in math. It's the same with my old behaviors. They worked for me in one situation, but not in another.

With my connection to my Higher Power, the support of the Fellowship of my program of Recovery, and the 12 Steps, I can take those first steps forward and to learn not only what doesn't work for me anymore but also what could work for me in the future. And forgive myself for mistakes along the way because I know whatever happens is meant to be. When I do this, I let myself be.

A meditation for July 19, 2013.

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namaste – a meditation


Namaste: The Divine in me recognizes and honors the Divine in you. I honor the place in you where the entire universe resides. I honor the light, love, truth, beauty & peace within you, because it is also within me. In sharing these things we are united, we are the same, we are one.

“Namaste” is a word that is used to greet people in the Indian culture.  I love the meaning of it. When I meet and interact with people around me, especially people that I have difficult relationships with, I try to say this to myself as a prayer. In doing so, I remember that just as I have a Higher Power, so does the other person. I can honor and trust that, and in doing so, I can relieve myself of my need for control over the other person and I can have acceptance. “Namaste” reminds me that just as I am human and a part of the world with my own past and on my own path, so is the other person. When I can respect that, I am able to relieve myself of my tendency towards judging others and I can have compassion. Saying “Namaste” also reminds me that inside me is the potential and need for love, light, and serenity, just as there is in the other person. And when I realize there is this potential and need in both of us, I can relieve myself of my fears and defenses against the other person and I can give and receive love. When I say “Namaste,” I am reminded of all of these things and, in that moment, I can accept, love, and respect other person just as I am able to accept, love, and respect myself. When I do this, I am connected to Higher Power and I recognize that the other person and I “are united, we are the same, we are one.”


A meditation for July 18, 2013.

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Sponsorship Round Table – Episode 32

If you just want to do recovery all by yourself… If having a sponsor sounds frightening… If you’d like to have a sponsor, but you don’t know how to get one… Then keep listening as hosts Mark, of Recovered, and Kelli, of The Recovery Show, lead a joint round table about sponsorship. In this conversation with Mark and Kelli are Jason, Russ, Spencer, and Swetha.

Our round table was sparked by a voice mail from Bronte in Australia. She leads us into questions such as: What is Sponsorship? Why is it important? What to look for? What to watch out for? How do you develop trust? How do you get a sponsor?

Joe, from California, asks about changing sponsors. He wonders about questions like: Does changing sponsors mean giving up on the program? Is changing sponsors a bad thing? What might be a bad reason for changing a sponsor? May a newcomer change sponsors?

We also hear from Liz, in Florida, who recently changed her sponsor, raising these questions: How do you know when to change sponsors? What if you are not clicking with your sponsor? How do you break up with a sponsor?

During our discussion, we talk about our experiences being sponsored and sponsoring others in our fellowships. We address questions like these: How does sponsorship help the sponsor? Can any member be a sponsor? How do you get a sponsee? When is a member ready for sponsorship responsibility? What does a sponsor do and not do? What if you are asked for advice? Is there any one best way of sponsoring a newcomer? Is it possible to get too attached to a sponsee?

This is also episode 426 of Recovered.

Our topic for next week is compassion. Please call us at 734-707-8795 or email with your questions or experience, strength and hope. Or just leave a comment right here.

healing – a meditation


Life will give you whatever experience is the most helpful for the evolution of your consciousness.

-Eckhart Tolle

When my body is hungry, I crave food. When my body is thirsty, I crave water. I don't have to be in control of that.  My body knows what to do to heal itself. It seeks what it needs. Sometimes, I don't want to eat when I'm thirsty because I'm too lazy to get myself some water. Or sometimes I don't want to eat when I'm hungry because I feel too busy to get myself some food. But that's my mind talking. My body is simpler. More straightforward. It knows what it needs to heal.

My soul is the same way. It seeks out situations that it needs to heal.  It seeks out interactions with controlling people or people that engage in behaviors that trigger me so that I can have the chance to set my boundaries and heal. Soul craves growth. Sometimes, in those situations, I don't want to set boundaries or respond in a healthy way because I feel scared or hurt. But that's my mind, getting in the way. My soul is simpler. More straightforward.  It knows what it needs to heal. The trick is to silence my mind.

A meditation for July 10, 2013.

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