fear the fall – a meditation



nobody fears the height,
you all just fear the fall,
go to the edge sometimes, and
prove your body wrong.

Dessa — The Crow


A friend writes:

One of the most powerful lines from this, for me, is at the end, where Dessa says “nobody fears the height, you all just fear the fall, go to the edge sometimes, and prove your body wrong.” Working through my 4th step had a lot of fear involved – I was fearful of admitting my wrongs, sharing them, and in a lot of ways, fearful of the promise of moving beyond these faults at some point, since I had gotten along this far with them (albeit a midst a notable amount of chaos and pain). The message I hear in this song, is that great things can come when we work past our fears. The program softens the blow, reminding me that I can take my time with the steps, and that change does not have to be this huge impending force, or surmounting hurdle, or big scary fall. It can happen through my HPs loving plan- a plan better than what I had planned for myself, and a plan that will not place more on my shoulders than I am able to carry.

A meditation for April 7, 2013.

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Asking for Help – Episode 15

We talk about asking for help. When we came in, we did not have experience asking for help in a healthy way. We didn’t want to impose on people we barely knew, we still thought we could do it ourselves. How did we come to understand that reaching out was not weakness, that others gained as much as we did by being asked, and that asking for help did not mean giving up? How do we feel and respond when someone asks us for help and support?

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everyone – a meditation



Everyone you will ever meet knows something that you don’t.

– Bill Nye, the Science Guy

I used to think that I had to have the answers for every problem in my life. I used to think that I had to fix everything and everybody around me, by myself. I used to think that asking for help showed weakness.

I have learned that others often have a better answer than I ever think of. I have learned that it is not my responsibility, nor within my ability to fix everyone and everything. I have learned that asking for help shows strength. Sometimes, it is not that you are smarter, more knowledgeable, or more capable than me. It is just that you are not me. You have a different perspective, you see things in a different way, you have different life experience to draw upon, and you definitely know something that I don't. I can only gain from asking you for help.

A meditation for March 14, 2013.

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sorrow – a meditation

A power greater than ourselves provides the beauty of a flower.


Once you express your sorrow
from the bottom of your heart
it will be washed away.
Look at a flower
it can never hide its scent nor its color.

– Rumi

Step 9 asks us to make amends to those we have harmed. When we do so, we are cleansed. We don't do it to gain forgiveness, we do it to remove the stain of sorrow, remorse, and guilt from our own hearts. The color and scent of our flower show forth more strongly and clearly, as we live our life more honestly.

A meditation for March 13, 2013.

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Step 3: turning it over – Episode 14

Step 3, Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood God. How do we understand and use it in our lives?

Swetha, Spencer, and Kelli talk about our experience and understanding of Step 3, “Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood God.” Spencer kicks off the discussion by with his initial problem with that step. He did not grow up with an image of a God that he was willing to turn his life over to. Kelli agrees that she felt similarly, and asks for feedback from listeners who came into the program with a helpful concept of God. Her initial reaction was “how can I get around this step?” Swetha also talks about her disbelief in the God of her parents. We all wanted to retain control of our lives.

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