Mary Pearl T, Step 1 – Episode 259

Mary Pearl T shares on Step 1, “We admitted we were powerless over alcohol, that our lives had become unmanageable.”

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Perspective – Episode 258

What does it mean to “place our problem in its true perspective”? Can a change in perspective change everything?

    • Our suggested opening says “as we learn to place our problem in its true perspective, we find it loses its power to dominate our thoughts and our lives”.
    • What is perspective?
      • From dictionary.com:
      • the state of one's ideas, the facts known to one, etc., in having a meaningful interrelationship: You have to live here a few years to see local conditions in perspective.
      • the faculty of seeing all the relevant data in a meaningful relationship: Your data is admirably detailed but it lacks perspective.
      • a mental view or prospect: the dismal perspective of terminally ill patients.
      • a way of regarding situations, facts, etc, and judging their relative importance
      • the proper or accurate point of view or the ability to see it; objectivity: try to get some perspective on your troubles
      • Scrabble points: 26
    • Perception and attitude: perception is how i see things. Attitude is how I react. (http://sarahtauber.com/interesting-words/perception-vs-attitude-difference/ )
    • How do I lose perspective?
      • (Over) reacting in the moment.
      • Dramatizing / awfulizing
      • Minimizing (denial)
      • Not looking at “the bigger picture”
    • What happens when I lose perspective?
    • How can I “put things in perspective” (https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/anxiety-files/201702/putting-things-in-perspective)
      • Ask yourself what is the cost to you and others of your reaction?
      • Observe and describe rather than judging.
        • HALT (Am I hungry angry lonely, or tired?, WAIT (why am i talking), THINK (thoughtful, honest, intelligent, necessary, kind)
      • What can you still do? (Serenity prayer, first things first)
        • Pause
        • Serenity prayer
      • Ask how you will feel in a week? A month? A year?
        • Regret, shame, guilt? 8th step list?
        • How important will this seem in the future?
      • Consider it as an inconvenience instead of the “end of the world.”
      • “Rational” comes from “ratio” — consider proportion
    • Making crisis work for us (https://al-anon.org/blog/affairs-making-crises-work/ )
      • Breaking through denial
      • Slowly rising awareness
      • Sudden revelation
    • TED talk “transformative power of classical music”  — Story (from The Art of Possibility) about shoe salesmen in Africa, opportunity, and perspective. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r9LCwI5iErE\
    • Program tools
      • Serenity prayer
      • Let go and let God
      • How important is it?
    • Quotes: https://www.brainyquote.com/topics/perspectives and https://www.brainyquote.com/topics/different_perspective

Readings

How Al-Anon Works:

  • Chapter 16: Tradition 1
  • Part 2, Chapter 16, “A Nun finds Spiritual Peace”
  • Part 2, chapter 31, “Letting Go of a Loved One’s Alcohol, Drug, and Money Problems”

Courage to Change

  • January 27, “sometimes dirty dishes are just dirty dishes” (How Important is it?)
  • June 24 — “It wasn’t much of a day for egg-laying, but it was a great day for music!”

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Continue reading “Perspective – Episode 258”

I am Powerless – Episode 257

Flowers in the hospital room

A “first step” meeting came at just the right time for me, this weekend. My mother had fallen and broke her leg. She lives almost 500 miles away, and I am powerless over the fact that she broke her leg, over the treatment that she gets, and over how she is feeling. I am using the tools of detachment with love, of finding the wisdom to change the things I can, and accepting the things that I cannot change. How do you find power is your powerlessness?

I read from Courage to Change, October 10.

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Tom – His sister needed Al-Anon – Episode 256

Tom grew up in a loving, chaotic family. As an adult, he found recovery for his alcoholism, but didn't know how to cope with the alcoholics around him. It wasn't until he decided that his sister needed Al-Anon, that he started attending regularly, and carrying the message back to her. Eventually, he started to see how he had been affected by this disease and continued working the program for himself.

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Readings

Tom read from

He also mentioned the Al-Anon 4th Step workbook, Blueprint for Progress.

Continue reading “Tom – His sister needed Al-Anon – Episode 256”

Speaker: Ann Marie R – Episode 255

bloomsThis week, I'm sharing a talk by Ann Marie R. I really enjoyed her humor, but also her ability to find gifts in troubles.

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