It’s the Journey – Episode 206

How has your past shaped you? Do you sometimes feel you can’t escape it, and that you will never “get it”?

Recently, I heard a couple of statements that, in my head, connected to recovery.

“We are not defined by what we did or who we were. Those are only the things that brought us to who we are now.”

“This is who I am now, and I know I will be different later. Life is about the journey, not the destination.”

Exploring these ideas:

  • What are my expectations of myself?
  • How are they shaped by my past experience?
  • In what ways do they not match my current reality?
  • How do I know?
  • What program tools can help me see that I am not my past?
    • Inventory (Step 4)
    • Gratitude list.
  • What tools can help me be more the person I want to be?
    • Detachment
    • Committing to change (Steps 6 & 7)
    • Amends (Steps 8, 9, 10)
    • Spiritual connection (Step 11)
  • How does seeing life as a journey feed my serenity?
    • Slogans: Progress not perfection. (not an official Al-Anon slogan?)
    • Easy does it.
    • One day at a time.

Upcoming topics include “The 3 P’s: Perfection, Paralysis, and Procrastination”. Please call us at 734-707-8795 or email feedback@therecoveryshow.com with your questions or experience, strength and hope. Or just leave a comment right here.
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Corrie L. Open Talk – Episode 205

I connected with a lot of what Corrie shared. I hope you enjoy her talk as much as I did.

Upcoming topics include the 3 P’s: Perfectionism, Procrastination, and Paralysis. Do you find it hard to get started because you’re afraid you can’t do it perfectly? Please call us at 734-707-8795 or email feedback@therecoveryshow.com with your questions or experience, strength and hope. Or just leave a comment right here.

My Body, My Codependency – Episode 204

The pit of my stomach is churning.
My neck and shoulders are tense.
I don’t have any energy.
My whole body is out of whack.

Do you feel this way? Have you felt like this? Let’s take a look at how living with alcoholism or addiction can our bodies and our health.

  • How was my body affected by the alcoholism in my house?
    • Laying awake at night worrying — tired and sleepy all the time.
    • “Knot in my stomach” — From “awfulizing” and “catastrophizing” the future and worrying about the present.
    • Anger and resentment — tension in my body — muscle pain
  • I had no energy for anything other than stewing about my situation.
    • No exercise
    • Poor eating habits (junk food)
    • Weight gain
    • Resulting in even less energy
  • The things I did to try to dull the pain.
    • Eating
    • My own drinking
  • Feedback effects
    • Not taking care of my body leads to loss of energy
    • Leading to depressed feelings.
    • And worry about my health.
    • Without the energy to “fix” it..
    • Leading to more not taking care of my body.
  • How does recovery change things?
  • Letting go
    • When I can “let go and let God”, I can loosen the knot of worry. I can relax the tension of anger and resentment. I can get go bed at a reasonable time, because I’m not sitting up late with worry or anger (or both!)
  • “Take care of myself”
    • Easier to do when I start letting go of taking care of my loved one.
    • Eat “right”.
    • Get some exercise.
    • Getting enough sleep.
  • Breathe
  • Meditate
    • Practice being still
    • Relaxing physical tension
  • HALT — Hungry, Angry, Lonely, Tired — When I am these things, I am more likely to “act out”. Being aware of the state of my body can help me live a calmer, more serene life.
  • Putting myself (my health, my well-being) first
    • Putting on my own oxygen mask
    • Learning to support rather than control
    • Practicing gratitude and acceptance

Readings

From Courage to Change: January 21, July 21, August 16, December 19.

From How Al-Anon Works: Chapter 12, Taking Care of Ourselves.

  • Please call us at 734-707-8795 or email feedback@therecoveryshow.com with your questions or experience, strength and hope. Or just leave a comment right here.

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Adult Children of Alcoholics – Episode 203

Did you grow up in an alcoholic or dysfunctional family? How has this affected your life today? How can you recover from your childhood experiences?

The ACA or ACOA program was created in the 1970s by a group of Alateen members who needed a program that focused on recovery from their experiences growing up in alcoholic or dysfunctional families. It is a separate 12-step program similar to, but separate from Al-Anon. Emily joins Spencer to explore how ACA is different from but also works together with Al-Anon in her recovery.

Our conversation was guided by these questions.

  • What is ACA?
  • How is it different from Al-Anon?
    • The focus of Al-Anon is on adult issues or spousal drinking, vs childhood issues in ACA.
  • What is the “laundry list”? (http://www.adultchildren.org/lit-Laundry_List)
  • How is the first step of ACA different? (http://www.adultchildren.org/lit-Steps)
    • “We admitted we were powerless over the effects of alcoholism or other family dysfunction, that our lives had become unmanageable.”
    • Why is this important?
  • How do ACA meetings differ from Al-Anon meetings?
    • Inclusion
    • No crosstalk
  • How are they the same?
    • Common topics
  • How has ACA helped you recover?
  • What would you say to someone who is considering attending ACA?

Please call us at 734-707-8795 or email feedback@therecoveryshow.com with your questions or experience, strength and hope. Or just leave a comment right here.
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Letting go of the Process – Episode 105 replay

Another busy weekend: Mothers Day and yard work.

I hope you enjoy this “retro” episode about Letting go of the Process with guest host Harriet, originally published in February, 2015.

Please call us at 734-707-8795 or email feedback@therecoveryshow.com with your questions or experience, strength and hope. Or just leave a comment right here.