Have you lost the ability to share intimately with another person? Have you found people in the program that you can trust with your secrets? What are your barriers to intimacy with your loved ones? Mara and Spencer talk about Intimacy.

We used these questions to inform our conversation.

• What is intimacy?
  • Vocabulary.com says this: Intimacy is closeness with another person, like the intimacy that develops between friends as you tell one another your life's story and all your secrets and dreams for the future.
• Do I have any intimate relationships in my life today? Have I had any in the past?
• How do I deflect or avoid intimacy?
• What keeps me from being intimate with my loved ones? My friends? My family?
• How have I learned to be intimate in Al-Anon?
  • “Safe place”
  • to be vulnerable
  • sharing by others
  • sharing with others
• How have I developed an intimate relationship with my sponsor?
• How am I deepening the friendships and loving relationships in my life? What might help me do so?

Questions from Blueprint for Progress:

1. How do I define intimacy?
2. What actions encourage intimacy and which ones don’t?
3. Which of my actions are helpful in bringing me closer to another person?
4. With whom was I intimate when I was growing up?
5. How have I shared important information with someone I didn’t trust?
6. Where do I get examples of positive, intimate relationships?
7. In what ways have I been intellectually or spiritually intimate with the alcoholic?
8. What activities help me show how much certain people mean to me?
9. What kind of examples do my actions convey about the importance of close relationships?

For me, intimacy is tied in with trust and fear. Here are some questions from those sections of the Blueprint:

1. What is my history of trusting myself?
2. How do I determine if someone is trustworthy?
3. How do I determine if someone has lost my trust?
4. How do I react when frightened?
5. What provokes my fears?
6. How do my fears affect the way I make decisions?
7. How do my fears of the alcoholic affect the way I interact with him/her?
8. How do I include my Higher Power when I feel afraid and what is the result?

Upcoming topics include trust, enabling, triggers, and Tradition 10. Please call us at 734-707-8795 or email feedback@therecoveryshow.com with your questions or experience, strength and hope. Or just leave a comment right here.

Music from the show

Simon and Garfunkel: Old Friends

The Civil Wars: Poison and Wine

Kenny Rogers with Dolly Parton: You Can't Make Old Friends